Articles Tagged with abuse

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fraudulent claims of abuseNothing is worse than divorce. Actually, the only thing worse than a divorce is a nasty divorce, or a divorce in which one partner makes vicious attacks and cruel claims of abuse that never occurred. Either party may be guilty of this tactic, causing misery for the innocent spouse, and often for the children, as well. If your spouse is using false accusations against you to secure some advantage in divorce proceedings, it is critical for you to obtain aggressive, ethical legal representation right away.

Abuse and Protective Orders

An individual who claims that abuse, stalking, threats, or harassment is occurring may file an order with the court to keep the abuser away. This can come in three varieties:

  • Personal conduct orders simply order specific behaviors, such as battering, destroying property, and harassing, to stop.
  • Stay-away orders are designed to make the person under the order keep a specific distance away from the alleged victim. That means the restrained individual must stay away from the home, work, school, etc. of the person who filed the order.
  • Residence exclusions require the individual named in the order to move out of the home that is shared with the person who filed the order, taking only personal belongings.

Consequences to Persons Named in these Orders

The impact of this type of order on an individual is immeasurable. In addition to marring one’s reputation irreparably, it can result in losing access to one’s home and children. It will limit the ability to go particular places, to own or keep a firearm, and to maintain immigration status.

Fighting Back Against Untrue Abuse Charges

With an experienced attorney, it is possible to battle false charges and mitigate the consequences.  This will encompass several key strategies:

  • Preparing evidence to demonstrate the reality of the situation: There are many ways to show an innocent person in a positive light. Perhaps there are emails, texts, or other communications that demonstrate your true nature.
  • Witnesses to your relationship with your spouse may be able to verify your claims of innocence. They can testify as to their knowledge of events that may have been misrepresented, or that never occurred at all.
  • Alibi witnesses may be able to show that you were nowhere near an alleged incident.
  • Circumstances can be examined to determine what might have motivated an angry spouse to make false accusations. Was it out of spite for an affair? Was it to gain custody of the children?
  • Presenting the real you in a court of law can speak volumes. Fabricated allegations can be unnerving, but your confidence and honesty will be a useful tool in establishing your credibility.

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abusive marriageAre you trapped in an abusive marriage? If you want to get out of the relationship, but have fears about how your spouse will react, you are not alone. Studies show that roughly 40% of women in California suffer from physical violence with an intimate partner at some time in their lives. If you find yourself in such a situation, an experienced, discreet attorney may be able to help.

Facts About Abusive Marriages and Domestic Violence

  • Women aged 18-24 are 11% more likely to have experienced physical violence in the past year than their older counterparts;
  • Women who were pregnant in the past five years are 12% more likely to experience violence than those who have not been pregnant;
  • Three-fourths of women who live in violent homes have minor children living in the home;
  • 5% of homicides statewide were related to domestic violence in 2008, with a total of 113 fatalities;
  • Of those fatalities, 88% were women.

Divorcing an Abusive Spouse – What You Need to Know

If you wish to extricate yourself from and abusive marriage, you may face an angry spouse who threatens your safety and that of your children. Be aware of several key points:

  • A contested divorce will take at least six months;
  • Courts are more likely to consider physical and/or sexual abuse than emotional abuse, which is an issue when seeking Abuse Prevention Orders;
  • The court can impound your address, meaning it will be blacked out in all court documents so your spouse will not know where you live;
  • Restraining/protective orders can be issued requiring your spouse to stay away from you and your children;
  • If there is not documentation of your injuries, you may be regarded as hysterical, or worse, vengeful in your pursuit to defame your spouse;
  • You may be asked to go through mediation prior to getting your divorce granted;
  • Your abuser will likely have some form of visitation rights with your children, meaning you may be in contact for years to come.

Protect Yourself Right Now

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799 SAFE. They can tell you about resources and local agencies that are set up to help women and children who need protection from abusers.  In the meanwhile, here are some things you should be doing:

  • Keep your plans hidden. Do not keep phone numbers, filers or other information related to domestic violence in the home where your abuser may find them;
  • Have an emergency plan to escape during an violent emergency; keep an overnight bag with prescriptions and other essentials ready to go if you can safely hide one;
  • Make your plans to leave permanently during an open window of time when your abuser will not be around to stop you;
  • Try to hide some money or get your own credit card, but make sure you have a PO Box to receive mail;
  • Find out about shelters that could accept you and your children;
  • Leave your cell phone behind so your abuser cannot track you;
  • Keep a journal, pictures, medical bills, and any other documentation if you can do so safely;
  • Keep online information safe;
  • File formal charges and get a protective order.

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