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Getting Through the Holidays While Divorced or Divorcing

getting through the holidaysWhile everyone else seems to be giddy for the holidays, you may be feeling a bit glum if this is your first holiday season by yourself after a divorce. Trying to create a festive home may seem impossible, but it is important to be gentle with yourself, and find ways to make the season special. Experts offer these suggestions to consider:

Focus on Giving During the Holidays

There really are people less fortunate than you out there, and giving your time and energy to help someone else can be surprisingly empowering.  You will find that your own troubles tend to melt away when doing good deeds. So, consider volunteering at a soup kitchen, supporting a Sub-for-Santa, or helping a family that has suffered serious losses in the recent California fires.  

Create New Traditions for the Holidays

If the thought of missing your kids or your family traditions has got you down, consider creating some new traditions. Find a new restaurant or bar to enjoy, a new town to explore, or new friends to hang out with.

Decorate

Do not bypass on the holiday cheer by forgoing a tree and decorations. Spruce up your place with fun new holiday embellishments. If you are tight on cash, string some popcorn for your tree. You deserve some holiday spirit, so take the initiative to create a warm holiday home for yourself.

Cooperate with Your Ex

Avoid punishing your ex, and make things easy for both of you by being flexible and pleasant when it comes to making arrangements for kids to spend time with each parent. It is the best holiday gift you can give yourself and the whole family.

Find Solace When and Where You Need it

When you find yourself feeling lonely, reach out to get the support you need.  Whether it is family, friends, or your faith, do not be too proud to admit you need a little help.

Do Not Sit Around Being Sad

Get busy! Take walks, go to the gym, catch the latest flick. Bake something, make something, or otherwise push your creative side to do something new.  Whatever you do, avoid burrowing under your covers and counting the minutes until the holidays are behind you.

Do Not Put Off Being Happy

Sure, things are different this year. But you are still you, totally worthy of satisfaction and joy. Believe it, and do not settle for the doldrums. Make choices that benefit you, and pursue a fulfilling life no matter what.

Happy Holidays

At Beck Law P.C.,  in Santa Rosa, we are cognizant of just how difficult changes in family life can be. We send our Christmas wishes and hopes for a beautiful new year out to anyone who is feeling alone this holiday season. May good things come to you and yours.

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